I Must Have Been Really Bad...
IN A PREVIOUS LIFE "And Then There Were Knees" by Gloria Christie
I just saw my knees! Oh sure, I knew they were there, but that isn't the same thing as actually seeing them. It's a sign. A sign that the 11 pounds that sit between me and surgery are gradually fleeing.
You see, I lose weight from my extremities in. Imagine that! My ankles decided to skinny up after an old surgery much to my delight. One day not too long ago I was shocked to see my shin bone! I have a matching pair.
You may recall that I accidentally lost 44 pounds. I should have guessed when my underwear kept falling off. Well, that kind of surprise is the up side of avoiding the scales.
Oh sure, I did all the for-profit programs. And then there were the ones of my own invention. The eat-yogurt-and-only-yogurt diet. Or the corncake-and-only-corncake diet. Let's not forget the protein-shake-and…do you see a theme here? I'm not recommending any of them, because they don't work.
It's inherited. When I called my dad, he was eating dinner --oatmeal and salmon.
I have been dieting for decades and decades, and nothing worked.
So when I got to The Home for Wayward Writers and Others, they weighed me. And I made him weigh my twice. I call my current diet The-Eat-Everything-You-Hate Diet. But I wouldn't recommend it either.
Any guesses what I'll discover next? I'm thinking my head. That's an extremity, too, isn't it?